SIXTY

In less than a month, that's what I'll be......60....

Sixty

SIXTY

6 DECADES.....

Three fifths of a CENTURY.....

No matter how you look at it, it's old....Well, maybe not compared to 90, or 85, or 76, or 64, but still, 60 feels old. It feels like, if I died, no one would think how tragic that is, that I died too young. Everyone, including me, would say, "She had a good life, a great life, she died a happy woman." They wouldn't say, "Oh, how sad.....she died too young."

Sixty (60) IS old. And anything beyond that is icing on the cake......

So now the trick is to get past feeling old and figure out how to stay young.....young at heart anyway. And I think I know how to do that, it's just a matter of mentally getting past the 'old' feelings---those physical aches and pains that seem to have crept into daily living, those scared feelings of being 'at the end', and the fleeting but pervasive thoughts that I've already lived the best part(s) of my life and now it's downhill from here.

It's time to put all that into perspective with grace and gratitude, and move forward, with wings on my feet and a song in my heart.....and I know it's in me to do just that.....and I will, maybe even before I actually turn 60!

But, for right now, I'm only 59 and 11/12---so if I curl up on my favorite chair with Daisy, my favorite Beagle, and take a little afternoon siesta, it ISN'T because I'm old.

I'm just resting........and savoring these days before I can no longer deny that I'm SIXTY. :)

Our Little Conundrum Called "Las Vegas"

For decades, Las Vegas has been one of our 'places', beginning as a resting point for our motorhome trips when we were schlepping our young children from Michigan to California to visit their west coast grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins......then becoming an annual get-away spot for my sister, Diana, and I to meet (this tradition began the year after our mom's death in 1990 and continued for about a decade.) THEN, Carlton's sister lives there, one of our now-grown sons moved there, two of our other grown children moved to Colorado, it's 'close' to Sacramento and Phoenix where other family members live, and so it just seemed to make sense to make Las Vegas our 'west coast' home-base. Two years ago, we sold our motorhome and leaped into condo ownership (of course having no idea what was to become of the economy a year later, but oh well....). Our place is way south of the strip in a residential area (yes, people actually do raise families there!). We have a beautiful park right across from us where we take our two dogs twice each day and where people socialize beginning at 6:30 in the morning until 11 pm when the giant floodlights go off over the baseball diamonds. We have really begun to feel that Las Vegas is way more than an indigent's dream city or an entertainment den of iniquity...(even though my purse was stolen out of our rental car the day before we closed, and our condo was robbed last month! But those are whole other stories!--ask any Vegas resident--robbery is as common as strippers there!). As I said, we have been feeling pretty good about our decision; we love our cozy little 1000 square feet with its little private patio in back and beautiful vegetation in the front.....and we get to see so many people that we otherwise wouldn't.....the winter sun is much warmer than ours here in Michigan, AND to top it off, Las Vegas is where we go to CHURCH! We've been going for over a year now (and the Sundays we're not in Vegas, we listen to the podcasts!) . I call it 'Rock and Roll Church' because of the live music up on the altar (stage?); the 'regular-guy' pastor clad in jeans and a casual shirt; lots of cool multimedia presentations; full-immersion baptisms; communion for ANYONE who cares to take it; bible interpretations that make sense; and a fully inclusive atmosphere.....well, we love it there. And maybe one day Carlton will even get baptized! (my dream, not his). It's weird, though, when we tell anyone who doesn't know us that we're going to Vegas, we're sure they conjure up images of blackjack tables and slot machines, booze and debauchery. For us, it's all about Carlton's sister, our kids, other family members who fly in (which has happened a LOT!), trips to Sacramento and Denver, and ...........CHURCH. Yup, our little conundrum........we can't figure it out either. :)

Once A Mom, Always A Mom

So my 'baby' turned 24 a couple days ago. He was at the house for the weekend, to celebrate Mother's Day and his birthday. He actually IS a Mother's Day baby---one of the many profundities of my life.....my firstborn was born on the First Day of Spring, 1976, my last one born on Mother's Day, 1985. (Sorry, but I do not believe those are mere coincidences, but rather reflect the 'magic' of life). When I was a little girl, all I ever wanted to be was, #1, a teacher, and #2, a mommy. I got to be both! But my favorite job by far has been the mommy gig...
So anyway, when we were having Mother's Day/Birthday dinner, Zach told about the tradition at work whereby the Birthday Boy/Girl is supposed to bring in some kind of special treat. Last year, Zach didn't participate. He has no 'significant other' at this point in his life (who would happily put something together for him), doesn't consume fattening or sugary foods himself, and basically thinks that people should be bringing HIM stuff, not the other way around (I can see his point). Anyway, I suggested we stop at Sam's and pick up some cupcakes or something, and at some point we decided that I would bake his favorite cookie, Snickerdoodles, for his coworkers. So we got home from dinner, and I got right at it. I must admit I think they were the best batch of Snickerdoodles I've ever made----(must've been the organic cinnamon!) Zach texted me later in the day on his birthday, letting me know what a hit his Birthday Treat was, and I had to smile to myself----Who would've thought that 24 years after my last baby was born, I would still be making birthday treats? Yup, once a mom, always............

The Circle; Round and Round It Goes

Over the past 72 hours, via text messages, emails, phone calls, and voice messages, Sarah has been detailing her exciting adventures as Education Coordinator for the Foothills Art Center (FAC) in Golden, Colorado. As it so happens, her first day in her brand-spanking new position coincided with the Center's opening of a new exhibit, called 'Colorado Art Open'. This exhibit features various, sundry, and juried works by local artists..........a collection of over 100 pieces ranging from Sculpture to Photography to Intaglio.
Sarah is learning a whole new language, she tells me, and entering a world that she is unfamiliar with......but that pulls her in .....like Alice and her rabbit hole. As she talks, my own mother's spirit stands beside me, taking it all in....my mother, an artist in her own right. My mother, former president of the Farmington Art Club (FAC), who spent decades perfecting her own skills with oils, acrylics, watercolor, who participated in juried shows, sold her pieces, knew the language of Art......my mother's spirit is awash with joy as she feels Sarah's enthusiasm and hunger.....
And amazingly, as a newcomer to creating my own art via watercolor, I too am pulled into this new world that Sarah is entering....I too feel the giddiness and wonder of creativity, of putting one's soul into something tangible......something that others might look at, and see you there...
There is a circle here.......Sarah, me, my mom.....and there is something so profound about watching that circle and being a part of it, all at the same time.......
How did I get so blessed in this life?

Cinderella Magic

Clara turned 3 on Saturday, March 28. Anyone reading this will no doubt believe that everything I say about Clara is totally skewed by the fact that I am her grandmother. But, believe me when I tell you that this little girl is as special as special can be, in every way; her adorableness, her quick-wit, her intelligence, her sweetness, her sense of humor, her enthusiasm for life, her 'with-it-ness', her sense of herself, her curiosity, her expressiveness....okay, I'll stop. (Wait, did I mention how cute she is?)
But, anyway, at her birthday party her Grampa and I gave her a real, bonafide Cinderella dress, complete with an 'authentic' crown and blue-glowing wand. When Clara was handed the bag to open (a Cinderella bag of course), she took one peak inside and knew immediately what this powder blue, sparkling treasure was, pulled it out lickety-split, and smiled one of her signature broad, open-mouthed smiles, with her eyes as wide as they could be. Within a fraction of a second, she had pulled off her cute little fiesta party dress that she was wearing and yelled at her mom, "I want to wear it, I want to wear it!"
JoAnna began madly tearing off the tags and plastic ties in an effort to get her mostly-naked daughter re-dressed as quickly as possible. Fortunately, the Cinderella dress floated over Clara's little body with no effort, and she was instantly transformed into the beautiful little princess that she already is----her mom set the crown on her head, Clara was handed her new wand (to which she exclaimed, "A new wand!"), and she happily turned to everyone gathered around to display her new finery. It was a priceless moment to see this little darling of a girl standing there in her beautiful hooped dress, holding her head so still so as not to knock the crown off........with the happiest look in her eyes-----a magical moment indeed.

BLOOD

Yesterday I got back to my routine of donating a pint of blood to the Red Cross. I have been doing this for awhile, was surprised when I got my 'gallon' pin........but then we disconnected our landline and our local branch didn't have my cell phone number, and no one has called to remind me, so it's been over a year....and I've missed it.
I've been feeling sorry for myself lately, so I put "Donate blood" on my To-Do List last week-----yesterday the urge overcame me----"just go over to the donation center and sit and wait, forget about calling ahead and making an appointment....but give your blood today." My blood type is AB positive----a few years ago I noticed that my 'bag' of blood consisted of several small bags..and found out that it was because my blood was used for babies......I was thrilled. As a once-upon-a-time nursing mom, then in her 50s, it had amazed me that my body was still producing a substance that babies could use...no, that babies NEEDED in order to thrive.....WOW, it was thrilling to think that I could still physically nurture babies in some way.
So I drove over to the Red Cross Donation Center and walked right in; there were no people waiting in line. After finding out that my iron was really good, and that my blood pressure was really, really good, they laid me down and poked my arm.....and I noticed that my 'blood bag' consisted of the normal single bag, just like everyone else's......so I asked about the babies and was told that now only the Detroit donation center fills the baby bags for the babies......."because the blood lab is in Ohio and it's a lot closer for the Detroit blood to be driven there"......blah blah blah....

Admittedly, I was initially disappointed, even thought about going to Detroit and giving them my blood.....But I didn't-----I laid down on the comfy table, feeling totally relaxed, relinquished my body to the blood-draw......jotted down the date that I would be eligible for my next donation.....(what is it, 54 days from now?)

And then today, it suddenly occurred to me that maybe someone's life was saved with my blood today----someone, somewhere, someone in need (who cares who it is or how old they are)......someone needed my blood----my blood, made by my body----no sacrifice to me really besides taking the time to drive over there, go through the proper procedures, accept the pokings, believe that I won't get nauseated when I raise my head......someone out there in the world has my blood coursing through their veins, someone who was in some sort of medical emergency or health-threatening circumstance, this person benefitted by my little pint of AB positive blood.........this is a miraculous thing.

I will be back April 24.

"Sarah Goes Traveling Alone"

As a little girl, two of my favorite stories were Louise Eppenstein's "Sally Goes Shopping Alone" and "Sally Goes Traveling Alone". Little did I know at the time, one of these tales would turn out to be a prophecy in my own life.....or rather, my daughter's life. In these stories, Sally learns both the inherent joys and unanticipated fears of attaining true independence as she accomplishes a rather involved, complicated task all by herself. Much goes wrong for Sally as she shops and travels, but amazingly, she ends up where she is supposed to, and all ends well. When Sarah called me from the Denver airport to inform me that she had left her passport at home, and consequently would be taking a later flight to Mexico, and that she had also forgotten her Spanish phrase book (a rather important item for a non-Spanish speaker).......oh, and she was having trouble contacting the guy who would be able to contact Sra Ana, the person who was to meet Sarah at her new apartment at a specified time, a time which now needed to be re-specified.......and then she was informed by a Customs Clerk that a return flight receipt would be necessary in order for her to get through the customs process (she had no return flight), and her phone was broken "even more than before", and, and, and.............all I could picture in my mind was Louise's Sally, reincarnated as my Sarah........

Hearing her voice over the phone, I knew instinctively that all Sarah really needed from me was reassurance that all these little fiascos would not turn into disaster.....that she WOULD make it to Cuernavaca, and that all would end well. This morning I was ecstatic to see her appear in my little video screen on my laptop via Skype (an absolutely FANTASTIC internet tool!)---she carried her netbook around, showing us her new Mexican bedroom with its "own" bathroom, numerous windows overlooking multiple green growing things (somewhere hidden among them the roosters that so rudely woke her up this morning)......and also happily displaying her fresh bakery items that she had so bravely acquired "all by herself"!

Sarah made it to Cuernavaca and is quickly figuring things out......tomorrow it's off to Language School, then to buy a disposable Mexican phone, and to find out where she can get a Latte with low-fat milk.

Feliciatones, mi hija bonita! Usted lo hizo!